Like most, I am trying to make the home learning work and work in a way that isn’t about widening gaps. Therefore, I have spent that last few weeks, in isolation, making video after video designed to support students. I have been working mainly on creative writing so that we can develop, build and revise existing knowledge rather than introduce new content.
I thought I’d share how I have structured the videos for one week. Each one has a specific purpose related to dialogue and building on their use of dialogue in writing. The videos last about six to eight minutes long and allow students to pause and try out things. After watching the videos, students have to write three lines of dialogue for our ongoing story.
Video 1 – The basics
Video one talks them through using dialogue and attempts to clarify some misconceptions of dialogue. Generally students have a lot of misconceptions about dialogue. That’s why I have placed more emphasis on the purpose of dialogue. All too often, students use dialogue purely for narrative, and this is where they are missing out.
What is the purpose of dialogue? Why do writers use dialogue at a particular moment?
• Helps
us understand the character’s thoughts / feelings / personality
• Make
us understand who are the good and bad characters
• Help
us to see the protagonist’s relationship with others
• Helps
us move the story on
• Helps
us to add drama / conflict
Which one uses dialogue better?
[a]
“Hello,” said Bob.
“Hello,” yelled Frank.
“How are you, Frank?” shouted Bob.
“Good, thanks. How are you?” bellowed Frank.
[b]
‘Not seen you for ages, Frank?’ bellowed Bob across the room.
‘Been busy.’
‘We missed you at work. Thought your wife was ill.’
‘Nah, just busy,’ Frank replied curtly.
Common mistakes
These are the main problems students have with writing dialogue
• Copying
a normal conversation and the rules of a normal conversation
• Writing
lots of dialogue – keep to three lines at a time
• Too
much phatic talk – How are you? I am fine
• A
lack of indirect speech
• Overusing
names and verbs
• Not
using dialogue structurally
• Make
all the characters sound the same
Take one of these and turn it into a three line conversation
‘You lied to me, Tom!’
‘Have you always loved her?’
‘You’re an idiot.’
‘Did you really do it?’
Example
‘Did you really do it?’
Tom whispered, ‘Shh. Don’t.’
‘Come on. You can tell me. Did you really do it like we planned?’ asked Terry with enthusiasm.
Key Tips
• Make
your characters have contrasting personalities
• Hint
at something larger – something under the surface
• Don’t
spell things out - you don’t have to say ‘I love you’
• Don’t
overuse names and verbs – use them once, effectively
• Stick
to two or three lines of dialogue at a time
Video 2 – Building sentences
Video two gives them an example sentence and students use the structure of that sentence to create their own sentence. The example here is getting students to use two bits of dialogue added to a bit of narrative action.
‘There,’ said the schoolmaster as they stepped in
together; ‘this is our
shop, Nickleby.’
Nicholas
Nickleby, Charles Dickens
Sentence Broken Down
‘There,’
said
the schoolmaster as they stepped in together;
‘this
is our shop, Nickleby.’
Example
‘Hello,’ said the woman as she removed her helmet slowly; ‘I didn’t expect to meet you here.’
Video 3 – Pushing it further
Video three aims to develop the sophistication and subtly of the dialogue and making it do something more than just be about a conversation, building in inferences and subtext. I talk through each one and explain how they add meaning.
Looking at how tone can be used
I talked about the use of italic and inverted commas to help emphasise the tone of sentence.
‘Did you really do it?’
Tom whispered, ‘Shh. Don’t.’
‘Come on. You can tell me. Did you really do ‘it’ like we planned?’ asked Terry with enthusiasm.
Looking at how pauses can be used
‘Did you… really do it?’
Tom whispered, ‘Shh. Don’t.’
‘Come on. You can tell… me. Did you really do ‘it’ like …we planned?’ asked Terry with enthusiasm.
Looking at how body language can be used
‘Did you… really do it?’
Tom whispered, ‘Shh. Don’t.’ His eyes didn’t meet Terry’s eyes.
‘Come on. You can tell… me. Did you really do it like …we planned?’ asked Terry with enthusiasm.
Looking at how indirect speech can be used
‘Did you… really do it?’
Tom whispered, ‘Shh. Don’t.’ His eyes didn’t meet Terry’s eyes.
‘Come on. You can tell… me. Did you really do it like …we planned?’ asked Terry with enthusiasm.
He refused to speak to me. He’d not even answer my questions.
Exploring the impact of choices with a different example
‘You lied to… me, Tom!’
‘I didn’t really lie, but avoided …telling the truth. You see: I wanted to protect you.’
Tom stood up and raised himself to his full height.
‘Protect me! Protect me from what… No, protect me from …who?’
Jasmine stopped talking. She knew that he’d never answer her questions, no matter how many times she asked him.
What do these subtle things do to the dialogue?
• Sense
of shock
• Thought
they had a strong relationship
• Defensive
and not willing to back down
• Sense
of hopelessness
I have to say that making PowerPoint videos in six to eight minutes is helping to channel my thinking on ideas. My thinking is having to be more precise and relevant. It is challenging time, but we adapt, nonetheless. And, I will be able to use these in lessons, when all this is over.
Feel free to use the content here and I’ll be happy to share more of these, if people find them of use.
Stay safe,
Xris
P.S. I will not be sharing the videos I have made. I am happy for the likes of others to make them, but I’d rather not inflict my voice on society.
HI Chris I'm really keen to have a go with some of the work you've explored since lock down. Would it be possible to share your ppts - even if you don't want us to see your video?!
ReplyDeleteI'm going to start year 10 with your opening sentence idea next week!!